I am finding that change happens best when you know when to be hard and when to be soft; when to be unwavering in your demands, and when to accept small victories. For some roles we do a disservice to the cause of Christ if we do not find the best people who demand the best from themselves. At other times we do a greater disservice by discouraging normal people from normal contributions. Making the distinction only happens when the importance of the role, the development of the person, and the ultimate cause of Christ are held in balance.
Anselm explains how God exemplifies this agility, how he is both merciful and impassible.
Exeprt from Chapter Eight of PROSLOGION …
But how are you both merciful and impassible? For if You are impassible You have no compassion. And if You do not have compassion, You do not have a heart sorrowful out of compassion for the wretched-the very thing which being merciful is. And if You are not merciful, from where is there such great consolation for the wretched? How, then, are You and are You not merciful, 0 Lord, except because You are merciful from our point of view but are not merciful in Yourself? Indeed, You are [merciful] according to our experience but are not [merciful] according to Your experience. For when You behold us in our wretched condition, we experience the effect of Your mercy; but You do not experience any emotion. And so, You are merciful because You save [us] wretched [creatures] and spare [us] who have sinned against You; and You are not merciful, because You do not experience compassion for wretchedness.